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Topics - ped

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Spirituality / Trans or infinite?
« on: January 27, 2013, 10:30:19 AM »
Okay this may seem like bulls-word but I'm one of these and I'm not sure which. Any help? My mind has been in total chaos since I was a kid and I cannot get a handle on reality anymore. I need some guidance from someone. I have literally turned water into wine in front of co-workers as I spoke to them about unity and their infinite nature because they started questioning me, I can make the wind blow on command, my eyes glow orange to white when I speak of love, I control people when I am in this state as they usually try to run away so I have to pull them back against their will. But it's so random and I hardly remember the events until years later. It leaves my body feeling like I've gone through chemo therapy or something. And otherwise I feel like I'm basically soulless or something, like I'm ready to lay down and die quiet frankly.

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General Discussion / What drives the id?
« on: March 10, 2012, 07:11:30 AM »
I was in a discussion with a friend about some study on the news saying loneliness causes immunosuppresion due to high cortisol from the psychic stress. She insisted that the depression of loneliness comes from "not being happy with oneself." Living to others standards and not living your own life. So she exclaims be yourself and be okay with others rejection and social isolation.

So I asked what if being me means rape women and eat puppies?

She says "you're acting out of ego, and not your true self."

Now this is a notion commonly found in pop new age spirituality. That behaviour that is deemed negative or unacceptable in human society must be false personality. This despite being a common notion even within the Michael Teachings is contradictory to it's core thesis and to classic psychoanalytic models as well. It's a sort of unexamined and sophmoric ideal of human nature. Good action is true self, bad action is false self. Nevermind who decides what is good and bad.....which of course is always the new ager.

The infant soul is not acting out of false personality when it rips the liver out of an elk and eats it raw. The young soul is no acting out of ego when it steps on its coworkers back on the climb up the corporate ladder. It's acting out of its true self. Acting out of ego would be them NOT doing that. If they followed ego it would have restricted their drives and thus stunted their growth. They didn't get learn the lesson because false personality made them act in such a way as to conform to social ethics.

Because of this I think the new age notions of spirituality are damaging to spiritual evolution by insisting that all percieved negativity or negative action is false. No one will ever learn if we all conformed to new age idealism.

Soul age is what answers the question of what drives the unconscious in Freudian terminology. When the superego is in a state of diminished capacity we get a glimpse of other people's true unfiltered soul age. The question is asked why do some people act animalistic and quasi-retarded while others seem to desire a sophisticated type of societal power. And still others seek social insularity and a sense of belonging? Why do we not only see these common themes within relatively monolithic cultures themselves, but across all cultures in all times. What motivates the unconscious drives in human primates?

The seeking of knowledge, of spiritual enlightenment, of financial power, of influence within a closed society. These are the games of the ego. No one can help to play them unless they're in a coma. Action requires illusion and the only enlightenment is to realize that it literally is just a game. Not to not play the game at all.

New age spirituality is basically the game of the baby soul. It's the ego's attempt to redefine the dynamics between the id and the superego. Same thing that classic religion does, same game as political correctness and the social revolutionary mature soul. It's not a bad thing and it's not irrelevant, but it is just a game. Or masturbation if you will. This dynamic is what I think makes old souls annoyed with mature souls. Or it is for me anyway.

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General Discussion / computer issues
« on: August 12, 2011, 04:09:54 AM »
the darn thing crashed. It was my fault I thought I had a virus but now I know it was a malfunctioning SD card reader. by that time it was too late and the manufactorers reinstall already fudged the boot order and there wasn't anything I could do. So now I'm back up and running witha fresh OS install but my hard drive was wiped. I have zero of my old files. Maybe they could be recovered with some extra special work but basically it's all a new blank slate. I lost some really great pictures and some very important tax files and whatnot. But ya know here I am with the same computer as before, same hard drive size, same RAM, same processor, etc but none of the old stuff on it.


kill your parents and worship satan.

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Soul Age / possible infant soul?
« on: May 30, 2011, 09:58:09 AM »
I work with a really interesting guy and I think he may be an infant. he's in his late 50's and never moved away from home
except for 1 year in the early 90's when he married a woman who basically used him and took him for a ride.
when I first started at the place I work everyone warned me about him. he is obviously weird....but everyone else is a baby
anyway so they think everyone is weird. but he's actually quite eccentric and idiosyncratic. he's a very intelligent guy from a small town and is
considered nearly a genius by IQ standards. but when you talk with him it becomes obvious he isnt really smart at all. he is very scholarly and almost an idiot savant in that he remembers minor facts and dates in history to high degree but that's about all. he lacks practical application of information. he cannot put 2 and 2 together figuritively.

he has noted poor impulse control and it has gotten him fired from previous jobs on more than one occasion. he was a security
guard and one of his duties was to patrol on a golf cart. one day an black gentleman asked for a ride and the he told him
to sit in the back since he's used to it. when he was reported he was completely flabbergasted as to what the problem was.
chalked it up to excessive political correctness. this is one of many, many examples. a pattern of this sort of narcissitic
behaviour.

he is obviously a sage cast scholar. everyday I have to listen to him go on an hour long monologue that starts out with the weather
and ends in the evolution of surnames in patagonia. and always in there somewhere is his entire life history.

I first considered him to have asperger's or frontal lobe damage from a car wreck in the 70's he had. but after 2 years of hearing his stories I realize it cannot be brain damage as he has always been like this. he has no problem making eye contact and is actually quite (nay obnoxiously) outgoing. so I doubt any level of autism. he comes from the classic 'father is emotionally distant, extremely controlling
and manipulative and mother is a total neurotic push-over scared of the world.' both of them sound like typical babies. wouldnt let him go to
college because they didnt want everyone thinking their son thought he was better than them.

while he displays a clear mental dissonance and ultra-conformist attitude, he has no problem discussing his emotions or a rejection for certain traditional memes. he has somewhat of a disdain for religion, or so he says. he is a rabid conservative politically and considers the teaparty too liberal for him. despite talking about his emotions easily, he displays a significant lack of self-awareness, forethought and introspection especially in decision making. while he can talk at length about ancient greece,
he can cross the street and get hit by a car from sheer unawareness.

he is an unambiguous horder. he regularly buys old 53' semi-trailers and fills them up with junk to keep on his compound in the sticks. he doesn't understand peoplesmotives well and is often confused by others behaviour. he misses the point of many if not most things but will tell the most nerdiest of esoteric puns. he is in a hamm radio club and is really into that. he like to go to electric and telephone co-op meatings to the point he takes pride that he participates in such mundane, small town practices. he involves himself in small town politics although he hasn't the sophistication to participate himself.

often times at work he leaves an hour or two late because he is on one of his monologues. after he leaves his mother will call asking where he is. (remember he's almost 60 years old) and when I inform about it he literally throws a childish tantrum about it and proclaims he hates his mother for being so overbearing....like a teenager.


he has no interest in philosophy, spirituality, art, culture, food, etc, etc. he's interested in history and buying useless junk at rumage sales and that's about the extent of it. so he's materliastic in that sense but not really dogmatic. he is an very opinionated right-wing blowhard if you want to consider that dogmatic though.

this is a random collection of anecdotes and observations because frankly I'm confused about it. I understand it is hard to conceptualize from an internet post but the guy is all over the map and I think his scholar attitude (always reading something) kind of trips me up. I'm thinking probably very early baby at the most because being his age I find it hard to imagine he still retains that much imprinting.






anyway, Dave asked for more topics so here it is  ;D

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